Unexpected Happenings
by Books obssessed
Summary: A new enemy has appeared and places Holly in a difficult dilemna. Artemis Fowl has secrets of his own to which he has yet to expose...which will affect the People as well. With danger at their heels, survival in the human world becomes more difficult.
1. Chapter 1

One would shiver at the sight of Artemis Fowl's disconcerting features. There was a time when one would scurry away in fright at Master Fowl's icy remarks, but right now, his face was pulled into a rather boyish smile of delight. After all, after his experiences with the People, he had changed. _A good guy _like what Butler had said the day he had been transported to the demon island of Hybras only to return to find he had been missing for three years and was the older brother of twins.

"Artemis," Butler said, "you've something up your sleeve. What have you done now?"

"Fascinating," breathed the boy, oblivious to Butler's remark. His disturbing eyes, hazel and blue, glued to the laptop screen, his eye having been switched with Holly's during the time tunnel prior.

"Artemis, are you even listening?" asked the bodyguard irritably.

"What?" Artemis looked up, startled.

"Something's up. You have that look in your eye and I'm not happy about it. It only means you've gone and gotten yourself in a mess."

"On the contrary, old friend. I've discovered a piece of information that will prove to be quite intriguing."

"And…" prompted Butler.

"According to my databases, I've analyzed my deoxyribonucleic acid……DNA as it is called and it shows that I have traces of elfin DNA now. It appears that along with Holly's eye; some of her DNA must have transferred to me, as well. However, I do not know whether this is the same for Holly."

"Wait, Artemis. Will this affect you in any way?" questioned Butler anxiously.

"Ah, Butler. Even if this has to do with science, you're going to ask if it's going to harm me when I'm the one who is mastering and proving false the theories of scientific law," chuckled Artemis. He frowned suddenly. "Though now that you mention it, Butler, if it is so, the chances of me living the average lifespan of an elf is approximately 81. But that means I'll see many of those I care for, die."

"This certainly is a predicament," murmured Butler. The full meaning hit him abruptly. "Hold it. That means, whose going to protect you?"

"Questions, questions." Artemis rubbed his temples. This was not going to be good. At first, he had been delighted with the prospect. Now he felt remorseful. Once upon a time, the cold Artemis Fowl would have done much to attain such a—an opportunity, but thanks to Captain Holly Short, he was never the same. "I'll need to think over this Butler."

"Will you tell _them_?" Butler said.

"Who? Oh. No. At least not yet."

* * *

Captain Holly Short paced the room, furiously. She was going to kill Foaly if that was the last thing she did. The nerve of that centaur! How dare he say that she was in love with someone! She knew very well that it was a prank, but how dare him. She had been teased and bombarded by curious and grinning fellow fairies over who the special guy was.

Just then, Mulch barged in with an evil grin. "Hey, Holly! So who is it?"

"D'arvit," swore Holly, "not you, too. And NO, Mulch. There is no one who I fell in love with. It was just a joke that Foaly thought would be fun."

"Really? Who knew the donkey had some sense of humor?" smirked Mulch. "But then again, it could be true. Is it me?" He leered at her.

_Really, could this day could get any worse?_ "NO! Good riddance, Mulch. Who would fall in love with you anyways? I DO NOT LOVE ANYONE!!!!!"

"Touchy," remarked Mulch. He became serious all of a sudden. "You know, Holly, you should relax more. Take a vacation. This whole saving the world spree has gotten to you. Where's your fun side?"

"He's got a point for once." Foaly walked in. "You need a break. You used to be able to tolerate my pranks and even laugh a little. Now, it's as if you became older."

Holly restrained the urge to scream. "No, I don't."

"C'mon, Holly. Give it a rest. There's no more at the edge saving the world incident right now. Since it's rare that you take a break, take this opportunity." Foaly's voice was uncharacteristically gentle. "Think on it."

Shaking her head, Holly stalked out of the room.

Holly walked briskly across the street of Haven. Her mind reflected her life the past years. Then, it traveled further into the past with her as a hyper school kid. She was very different from the old Holly. Very few knew of the old Holly, anyhow. Her mind floated to what Foaly and Mulch had said earlier. _Were they right?_ She was so occupied in her thoughts, she didn't notice the shadow looming over her until it was too late. She started to confront her stalker but before she could, something slammed into her head. Unconsciousness was immediate.


	2. Chapter 2

Holly woke up to a room. Stiffly, she rose from the cot she had been lying on. Everything swam before her eyes and it took a moment for her to register her surroundings. Something wasn't right. She could feel it. She saw mirrors hanging everywhere and caught her reflection. She gasped. It couldn't be. It just couldn't. Reflecting back at her was certainly her features, but it wasn't her. She was human she realized with horror. The memories of the day before flooded her and mentally scolded herself for letting her guard down. Her appearance looked around fifteen to seventeen and she was in Mud Maid clothing which was fortunate. She needed help and fast. Her keen eyes picked out a piece of paper and she darted to it, eyes scanning the paper, anger mounting.

_Dearest Holly,_

_How do you like your new look? Enjoy your life now...but it's rather doubtful that you'll even enjoy it. You're going to be the People's disgrace. Consider it revenge and we're equal. I merely injected a little something in you and voila. I bet you're wondering how I pulled this off. I'm genius; I always have a Plan B. This time it involved my dear brother to do the work. After all, he was quite outraged to have his little sister in prison..._

_Opal_

Koboi! She wasn't even human! Insane! Holly fled the room, racing through corridors till she reached the exit. She continued with more discretion, knowing her human form would be very noticeable. Finally she reached Section 8 headquarters.

"Foaly!" she yelled pounding on his lab door.

"What is it?" The door slid open to reveal Foaly. "What's—" he broke off abruptly, staring at Holly. "Ho—Holly, is that really you?"

"Yes. Blast that pixie, Opal Koboi! She did this."

"Koboi?" Foaly's eyes widened. "That would explain, a lot, if she wasn't in prison."

"Her brother did it for her," growled Holly. She began wringing the air as if trying to strangle it. "He just had to inject some kind of thing into me and then I woke up to find myself human."

"What's the commotion?" Mulch strolled in casually only to stop and gawk at Holly. "A Mud Maid. You let a Mud Maid in."

"No, you toilet. It's Holly."

Mulch continued to stare. "D'arvit. What did you do with yourself Holly? You're human."

"Tell me something I don't know, and it is not my fault. Opal had her brother do this to me."

"I always knew she was a bitter pixie, but that's pushing it," Mulch said, shaking his head. "So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know!" wailed Holly, despairingly.

"Fowl will help. You'll stay with Fowl till we get this all sorted out; I'm sure he'll help considering how close you two have become." Foaly attempted a weak smile. "Hey, consider it your vacation."

Holly buried her face in her arms. "This is the end of the world."

"No, it isn't," Foaly reassure her. "Don't worry. Look at the bright side. You get to be above."

"You're right."

* * *

"What is it?" Butler looked at his young charge. 

"Apparently, Holly turned into a human, courtesy of Opal Koboi. She will be staying with us till the matter is cleared up. Juliet will be delighted."

"And you Artemis?" Butler raised an eyebrow.

Artemis blinked and flushed. "But of course Butler. She is, after all, a good friend. I'm glad I have the opportunity to have some fun with her instead of the formality we always have when saving the world from ruin."

Butler merely grinned rather cheekily at the boy, and it was rather unnerving to see it on the big man's face. Butler was known for being a formidable enemy, not a mischievous young one.

"Really," insisted Artemis. His normally alabaster white skin had turned a bright red shade. "If you excuse me Butler, I must go tell Juliet and arrange the guestroom for Holly's arrival." He walked out of the room with as much dignity as he could muster while trying to ignore the man's gaze.

* * *

Holly stood outside the door of Fowl Manor. She swallowed nervously as she waited for someone to answer the door right after she rung the bell. As she stood, she fingered the black skirt she was wearing. She had dressed conservatively, trying to look like a normal teen with white blouse and black skirt. She shifted uncomfortably in her heels, absently pulling on a long, smooth lock of auburn hair. She had used one of Foaly's creations to cause her hair to grow at an inch a minute for half an hour so her cropped hair wouldn't draw attention. 

"Holly," greeted Butler. "Welcome."

"Hey, Butler. How are you?" Holly hugged him tightly. Despite her increase in her height, her slim form was enveloped easily.

"I must say, looking human suits you. By the way, Juliet can't wait to get her hands on you. She's already planned out what you're going to do."

Holly laughed, a clear ringing sound like silver chimes. "Uh-oh. That can't be good." She stopped. "But wasn't she mind wiped?" She looked up and read his features. "You. You triggered the residual memories and told her everything. Oh well, I'm glad Juliet remembers. I missed her…..and you. Artemis, I guess. I've been bored."

Before Butler could answer, Artemis strolled in to join the conversation. "Tell me about it. Having you here is a relief."

Holly smiled. "That's nice. Are you getting soft, Artemis?"

Artemis rolled his eyes. "I've got twins, a girl and a boy who always want me to play with them, what did you expect? Mother and Father have been trying to get me more sociable, too."

"But then, Holly, you're the one who's changed him," interjected Butler as his prodigee gave him a dirty look. "If it hadn't been for you, he'd still be that arrogant prat."

Holly smirked. "That's why I'm so special."

"Holly, Holly!" Juliet tore through the hallway, grabbing Holly in a tight hug. "It's so great to see you. Big bro, here, also told me everything I missed so I know everything. This is so awesome," she gushed. "I've got the list of what we're gonna do. Shopping, playing pranks, movies. You name it. Shopping first though since you need clothes. Artemis has the bill so it's whatever." Juliet rambled on as she dragged Holly with her along with the small suitcase she had. "Come on. I'll show you your room. I did it myself."

Artemis and Butler watched the two girls disappear out of sight thought they could still hear Juliet.

"I feel sorry for Holly," grinned Butler. "Juliet is going to exhaust her."

Artemis just shook his head. "Females. You can't just understand them. No matter how many books I read to learn more about their personality, it doesn't help."

Butler turned his gaze to the ceiling as if asking for help. "Each person is different, Artemis. You can't just take facts from a book. Take Holly for instance. What do you think of her? Compare her with my sister. They're not the same."

"Ye—es," mused Artemis. "Quite right. Holly is very different from all the other females I've met."

"Meaning she doesn't swoon at the first sight of you like all other girls," Butler informed, dryly. "She's more likely to punch you instead."

Artemis glared witheringly at his bodyguard, but it was true. To his great disgust and amusement, all the girls he happened to encounter fell for his looks, attitude, and probably money as well. It wasn't his fault they couldn't keep a hold of themselves every time they caught sight of him. What was wrong with Butler these days? He kept going around this particular subject too much. Artemis shook his head and headed for his study. He heard Butler call after him.

"Are you going to tell her? It's a good occasion."

"Not yet, old friend. Not yet," he answered over his shoulder.

* * *

Sry, ppl. I'll update soon but i've got loads of hw. Halfway done w/ next chap though. 


	3. Chapter 3

Fowl Manor, Ireland

Holly currently was trying to digest the great deal of information, or rather, gossip that Juliet was throwing her way in her new guest room. She watched the teen girl with a mixture of amusement and exasperation.

"So Artemis came and told me that you were coming and…" Juliet babbled.

Holly laughed. "You've gotten older since I last saw you but you're still a wild card."

Juliet frowned. "Say that if you like Holly, but you're one too. Anyway, I'm back with Dom and Artemis since wrestling with big hairy guys wasn't really my thing. I like kicking butt and all the excitement, but it doesn't quite fit the bill. Body guarding is too strict for me but I don't know what will work for me."

Holly scrutinized the girl before her. "Looks like someone has gotten wiser," she teased.

Juliet shrugged and grinned. "Hey, wiser than Artemis at least; not genius, but wiser!"

Holly snickered. "I couldn't agree more. He doesn't know when to stop and someone always gets hurt when they get dragged into his petty little schemes. He'll probably never learn. That's probably why Butler always keeps his eyes on him. He's a little troublemaker."

"Totally!" Juliet bounced on the bed. "Don't let Artemis hear you though. He'll get all indignant and lecture you on 'age is often detrimental to intelligence' or the rot."

"So what? Punch him." Holly shrugged her shoulders.

"Now I like the sound of that!" chortled Juliet. "Though I certainly can't do that. Dom would kill me. But as for you…" Juliet shook a finger at Holly. "You could probably get away with it."

"Duh. Everyone loves me." Holly rolled her eyes.

"No _way,_" drawled Juliet sarcastically. "I had no idea."

"No idea about what?" came a new voice.

The two girls whipped around to come face to face with a rather sheepish and guilty looking Artemis Fowl.

* * *

Artemis tapped his long slender fingers against the wooden top of the table, miming a pianist's playing. According to LEP's technical consultant Foaly, Holly had been injected with something, causing her to change shape to that of a human girl. But something was off. According to his database, the note left to Holly said that Opal's brother was the one who did it……

Suddenly, he stood up. How could he have been so blind? He bounded up the steps to Holly's room. Stopping at the door, he heard two voices conversing. He paused and heard Juliet. "I had no idea," she was saying.

His mouth betrayed his presence to his horror. "No idea about what." He heard himself ask.

The two females whirled around, expressions of shock and horror pasted on their faces. Had Artemis meant to say something to fluster them, he would have found their reaction amusing.

"What are you doing here?" demanded Holly, regaining her composure.

"For your information, I discovered something rather vital regarding your human form," drawled Artemis, coolly. He inspected his fingernails and then glanced at Holly carelessly, all traces of emotion wiped away. "Now that you have gotten over the shock of being human, tell me, do you see anything peculiar about that letter you found? Perhaps, the phrase "_This time it involved my dear brother to do the work. After all, he was quite outraged to have his little sister in prison..._?"

Holly blinked. "Uh…..it's the end of the message?"

Artemis let out an exaggerated sigh. "How about, what do you know of Opal's family?"

"Well, her parents wanted her to be a good little girl and get an art's degree," Holly counted on her fingers. "Her folks are now in a nursing home thanks to her. She's an only child—" Holly froze. "She's an only child," she repeated. She stared at Artemis. "It wasn't Opal, was it?"

"Right, you are." Artemis gazed squarely at her. "Someone used her reputation as a criminal and knowing that you're her enemy, she was perfect. One problem was that apparently he or she made the mistake saying it was Opal's brother."

"But why?" Juliet interjected, feeling left out.

Artemis began pacing. "That's just it, isn't it? Why would they make Holly human and how are they able to do it? Look at the big picture. Holly is the recon hero and savior. She saved the People countless times and with her out of picture, who's to save the day? By eliminating Holly from it, these people have a chance at world domination or whatever. Making her human will also cause the People to alienate her. Who's to listen to a human? It's the perfect setup and we don't have the slightest notion who it was." He turned to face them. "Don't you see? Something else is afoot here. If they are so desperate to do the things they did, there must be something really drastic that will affect the whole world."

The grimness of the situation hit them hard. The wheels in Holly's mind began turning, searching who might be smart and evil enough to pull off such a stunt other than Opal Koboi.

"What can we do?" said Juliet, breaking the heavy silence.

"Nothing…" Artemis turned around to face the door.

"All we can do is wait," answered Holly, softly, "till they make their next move. We have to have something firm to start off."

"Unfortunately." Artemis started out the door. He paused, tilting his head. "Holly, I require your presence in my study in ten minutes. I have something to discuss with you of dire consequences." With that, he strode away.

"Looks like another saving the world adventure." Holly's lips twisted in a rather tight smile.

"I knew staying with you guys would bring adventure," announced Juliet.


	4. Chapter 4

**My thanks to my readers and reviewers. I'm uploading this as a Thanksgiving thing so Happy Thanksgiving. I revised the chapters prior to this so it might help to read through it again. The changes are subtle, however and probably optional due to that fact. Thanks so much.the writer

* * *

**

Fowl Manor, Ireland

Holly barged into Artemis's office unceremoniously and plopped herself onto one of the empty armchairs in front of his desk.

"Manners, Captain," Artemis remarked. "After all, you should at least retain some of your dignity despite you being, shall I say, a Mud Maid."

Holly glowered at the teenage boy, her cheeks flaming to a color that would have done Commander Root proud. "I'd hardly think that would matter in such a situation. I have just updated Foaly on our recent discovery, and he is as dumbfounded as all of us. According to his files, this must be a new enemy as all the potential criminals who are clever enough to rig this are either dead or at Howler's Peak."

Artemis raised a finger. "First of all, it was _my_ discovery," he stated, ignoring the look Holly was directing at him so venomously, "and secondly, I've already come to that conclusion. Fortunately for us, this person is most assuredly one of the People and humans have no idea of the People's existence…." He let the sentence hang.

"Yet," finished Holly. "With those like Foaly and Commander Vinyaya, he'll need something big to create fear and panic. When the right time comes, he most likely will alert all aboveground of our existence and we'll be fighting for time."

"One flaw in your reasoning. We don't know whether it's a male or female or even a group! For now, we'll just assume it's a single male."

Holly pressed her lips together and let out a frustrated growl. "I hate it that we have to wait until whoever it may be makes their move. Other times we took things into our own hands and seized the action. We're like sitting ducks."

"Patience is a virtue," quoted Artemis, whimsically. His eyes turned serious. "This is not going to be like what we've been through before. He knows what to do and has planned everything out. We have involved ourselves in a game with his rules. He's probably observed us and learned the mistakes that Opal and Cudgeon made. For goodness sake, he might know about Spiro and the Russian Mafia."

Suddenly, a beeping sound emitted from the computer. Swiveling, Artemis tapped in a few keys. There was a silence as Holly held her breath in anticipation of what it was.

"It's Foaly," Artemis said, finally. "There's been a casualty in Atlantis. A virus was sent and wiped out all information for the functioning of the city itself. This is it, Holly. The big thing. Apparently, this virus is a new prototype. Its sole function is to wipe out and destroy anything in its path and it's uncontrollable. Atlantis's defense mechanism triggered but it was unable to do anything. It merely stalled the virus before it too was extinguished."

"And…."

"And this could only mean that this virus is to be used to destroy anything related to technology, meaning no electricity, no function, nothing." Artemis scanned the screen again. "Luckily, the "guard dogs" gave Foaly just enough time to take a bit of the virus itself and download it to a chip. Currently, he is trying to develop a way to block it but it will take a while. Our opponent is a skilled hacker to be able to devise such a virus. It reproduces and spreads like a real virus. Astonishing really. I say we go to Foaly and get this chip and I'll attach one of my own worm trackers to the virus itself. The virus should go back to where it came from and destroy anything along the way including the hacker's information. That is unless he has already updated his security to resist and eliminate it. Either way, we have a good lead. A rather reckless action on his part but beneficial for us."

Holly pursed her full lips, her long slender fingers vigorously tapping an indentation in the wood of the desk. "We're not going back to Haven. We will attract too much attention. I'll notify Mulch and he can bring it over for us instead. My opinion is that we keep a low profile here as it's quite possible that the fairy has human connections."

"I have a low profile," Artemis protested.

"Uh huh," answered Holly, skeptically, raising an eyebrow.

"I do," insisted Artemis.

"Sure, you do," responded Holly, sarcasm sliding over her words. "I belieeeve you."

There was a knock on the door and the Butlers poked their heads in.

"Err—not meaning anything but if you want a low profile, you should attend the local high school. They have excellent reputation of good students," offered Juliet.

"It's a good idea," added Butler. "I'll also have an easier time protecting you."

"Regular high school!" hollered Artemis, all pretenses of dignity forgotten. His face flushed slightly in offended indignation.

"You've been eavesdropping," accused Holly at the same time, shooting the siblings irritated looks. "Manners!"

Then, as if on cue, Artemis and Holly exchanged glances.

"Oh my God!" yelled Holly. "There is no way I'm going to a regular high school."

Once again, at the same moment, Artemis glared at his protectors, particularly Juliet. "What have I said about listening into other people's conversations?!"

Juliet winced. Butler looked at his young charge in the eye. "Artemis," he said, evenly, "as your bodyguard, it is my duty to know what you are planning or doing so as to protect you better to the fullest possibility. How else will I know what we are up against?"

Artemis blinked. "I see," he mumbled. His face took up a thoughtful expression. "Like the saying goes, 'every cloud has its silver lining', and I can honestly say that it would be interesting to see the reactions of the teachers and normal people."

"Oh, so you finally realized you aren't normal," Holly snickered, smarmily.

Artemis gazed levelly at her. "I wasn't normal the day I was born," he informed, coolly. "My intellectual capacity was far higher than any being in existence." He paused. "Or for that matter, perhaps all of history."

"Arrogant brat," shot Holly.

"Don't listen to him," Juliet butted in. "All he can talk about is how intelligent he is. Anyhow, it wasn't like we were eavesdropping on purpose. We just were going to tell you we were going shopping."

Artemis winced. "Not shopping. Please."

Holly turned a confused look upon Artemis. "Huh? I thought you'd be a shopping maniac with you and your Armani suits."

Butler grinned. "It's not that, Captain. It's only the fact that Artemis, here, has a fan club following wherever he goes. In a mall….well, let's just say that there will be plenty of star struck girls ready to pounce."

Artemis frowned. "Really, Butler, is it necessary to disclose such information. It's embarrassing to say the least. Whatever possesses the feminine species to fling themselves over me?"

_"Ahem."_

Artemis coughed, lightly. "With the exception of both of you, of course."

"Much better." Holly spun on her heel while Juliet hooked arms with her. "So what were you saying about going to the mall?" Holly said, conversationally, facing her companion.

The duo swept through the doorway, chatting. Artemis looked on in disbelief and grimaced. "This is going to be torture."

Butler ignored the comment. "I'm assuming you haven't told her of your…condition."

Artemis arched one perfectly shaped eyebrow. "Now, whatever made you think that, old friend."

Butler raised a hand. "First of all, she has murdered you yet for disclosing the fact you have magic. Two, she hasn't run screaming bloody murder. Three, Foaly hasn't called. Four, the LEP haven't swarmed in here. And five, I was listening to your conversation."

"Trying a new tactic? A rather blunt one, too."

"Come now, Artemis. I know you too well; don't avoid the topic. There must be someway to reverse the mutation. Foaly could probably do it quite easily." The bodyguard scrutinized the boy in front of him. "You're not telling me something," he accused.

The boy slumped in a chair and rubbed his temples. "The elfin DNA overrides my human based DNA. My DNA will be no different other than the fact that it will alter my features slightly and my growth will be stunted. I will also be required to complete the Ritual once my DNA has fully changed. According to my calculations, it will be finished in a period of ten months."

"If that's true, Holly might accidentally find out once your ears start to become pointed. Isn't there a way to stop it at least?"

"What you don't understand, old friend, is that the genetic structure itself is far too complicated. Even the People aren't sure which part of the coding controls what."

"Artemis, what do you plan to do once the transformation is complete? You can't possibly live in the regular world of humans without people noticing."

"I plan to negotiate with the Council to permit me to continue my life with the People. They can't possibly reject one of their own, and they are greatly in indebted to me, if I recall." Artemis brushed off a nonexistent speck of dirt from his suit. "Now to the current matter…"

Butler shook his head. "If you're to attend regular high school, you need to get clothes ordinary teenagers wear. You may be over eighteen, but due to the time tunnel you still look no older than sixteen so no questions will be asked because of it. I wouldn't worry about choosing clothes. Juliet probably has a whole list planned out of what we're going to do and what we're going to buy at the mall."

"Hmm…it would explain why she was in her room for such a long time," mused Artemis. "I can't possibly believe someone would dress in such a horrendous outfit as other people my age do."

"That's 'cause you have no life." Juliet had come back with Holly in tow. She waved a piece of paper in front of the two males. "I've got all the stuff you need written down. Now let's go or else us, two girls, will go by ourselves."

Artemis looked slightly horrified. "We're going, and Domovoi is driving. If you drive, you'll ruin the car!"

"I could drive the car," offered Holly.

Artemis stared at her discreetly. "Holly, no offense, but if your driving is anything like the way you fly a pod, ship, or plane, I'd really prefer that Butler does it. I'm not really a masochist."

Holly blinked. "Are you sure? After all, our "saving the world" missions do involve a whole lot of "life at risk" escapades."

"Quite sure. Now shall we be off?" Artemis motioned to the door.

"'Bout time." Juliet grabbed Holly's hand and pulled her away.

"I'll go bring the Bentley around." Butler maneuvered his massive frame out the entrance, leaving Artemis behind.

* * *

When Artemis finally reached the girls, he found them waiting by the driveway. At the same moment, Butler pulled up by it. Artemis opened the side door and motioned for them to get in. "Ladies first."

Holly raised an eyebrow. "Since when did you become the gentleman?"

Juliet eyed the raven haired youth. "That's a very good question. I want to know, too."

"I'm always the gentleman. After all, I _am _Artemis Fowl. It just so happened that I never had the chance to show you."

The two exchanged looks. "O-_kay…_" they both answered together and slid into the vehicle.

Artemis shut the door soundly and slipped into his seat next to Butler. Butler gave him a questioning look and then grinned a knowing smile. Artemis scowled, almost imperceptibly. Butler merely turned around to face Holly and Juliet and asked, "Ready?"

"Duh."


	5. Chapter 5

The Mall, Ireland

Butler steered the Bentley expertly through traffic and located a parking space within minutes contrary to many other drivers. In a flash, Juliet dragged Holly out of the vehicle and into the building, leaving Artemis and her brother behind.

"If only she'd react that fast during our training sessions," grunted Butler. He eyed his young charge who had taken out his laptop and begun typing. "What are you doing, Artemis? Aren't you going in?"

Artemis didn't bother looking up. "I'm checking my bank accounts, Butler. And why would I ever want to go in?"

"You need normal clothes," his bodyguard reminded him. "You'd draw far too much attention with suits which I am sure you are aware of."

"I'm sure you'll find something appropriate for me," Artemis dismissed.

Butler frowned. "I can't leave you alone, Artemis. I'm afraid you'll have to come in as well in order for me to protect you with my fullest capabilities." He winced. "Even if it is hormonal teen girls."

"More reason not to go. You can stay with me in the car. I'm sure Juliet will have no problems picking out clothes for me."

Butler was beginning to feel extremely frustrated. "Juliet will probably choose something outrageous that you would not even think of wearing. It's best you see for yourself what you're going to wear."

"I highly doubt that my disapproval or presence will deter her from purchasing something outlandish." He glanced up. "I'm quite positive you are conscious of this fact."

Seeing polite conversation wasn't working, Butler tried a new tactic, and besides, he really was getting irritated. "Just as I am conscious of the fact that you are behaving as an overgrown child."

Artemis raised startled eyes. "Well, Butler, that really was a sharp remark." He smiled. "A change from the blunt language you customarily use."

"Artemis, you are going shopping in that mall." He handed the boy a hooded sweatshirt. "Wear it." Artemis opened his mouth to speak. "No buts."

Artemis stared at the hoodie for a moment before putting it on. "What happened here?" he muttered. "I thought I said what to do and everyone listened."

* * *

Inside the mall, Ireland (Approximately four hours later)

" Butler, where in the world is Juliet and Holly?" asked Artemis, pulling the hood more over his eyes.

"Not the slightest idea," was the answer. Butler's eyes scanned the premises for possible assassins which seemed unlikely considering the fact that majority of the population were teens. "Why don't you call them?"

Artemis flipped open his wafer thin cell phone and dialed Juliet. He didn't have to wait long. "Artemis! Where are you?! We've got nearly all of Holly's clothes. We just need shoes and accessories and visit the hair salon. Speaking of hair, we have to do something about _yours_! No one keeps their hair like their going to a formal dance party."

Artemis patiently waited for the tirade to end. "For your information, we were searching for you for the past 4 hours, 12 minutes, 27 seconds and counting. Regarding my hair, I believe it's perfectly normal, and where are you located in this mall? It really is killing my feet."

"Fourth level, at the farthest corner to the right. They have the cutest shirts!"

Artemis pinched the bridge of his nose. "Very well. Please stay there till we reach you."

"Don't worry; I don't plan on leaving this shop for a while. There's a really nice guy here," Juliet whispered conspiratorially. "Not that you're not good looking or anything, but—."

"Enough, Juliet. Put Holly on the phone." Artemis was beginning to feel the stirrings of irritation.

"Whatever."

"Artemis?"

"Holly, how are you managing?"

"I suppose well enough," was the reply. "Hard to keep up, though. Juliet appears to be know a lot of guys who work here. I think that's why she goes to the mall so much. You might want to tell the big guy. Butler won't be too happy when he finds out on his own. At least we know he won't murder you."

"I'll have you know that we are on our way."

"Don't let Juliet get her hands on you by the way." Holly hung up.

"Huh?" Artemis blinked. _Wait, that isn't even a real word. And what does she mean by that._ He snapped his phone shut. "Let's move. Fourth level, farthest corner on the right."

Les Plus Belles, Fourth level, farthest right corner

* * *

Holly coughed lightly. "Juliet, is this really necessary?" She surveyed the racks of lingerie on one side of the shop with a faint blush staining her cheeks. She really shouldn't be embarrassed. She was the fearless captain of the LEP for goodness' sake.

"Of course," Juliet answered, flicking through racks of shirts. She pulled out a black one and held it up to Holly. "What do you think?" Without waiting for a response, she tossed it along with the other pile of clothes selected. "I like it, too."

Holly sighed, having realized that arguing with Juliet was pointless in this case. Either way, she ended with that particular garment anyways. Holly noted, with a wince, that many of the clothes were rather too unconservative for her taste and silently vowed she'd hide those as soon as possible when they returned to the Manor. Her thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Are you _sure_ this is an underwear? It looks more like strings put together."

Fourth Level

* * *

" Butler, would you mind if Juliet dated?" Artemis wove through the crowds, keeping his features half-hidden. Luckily, no fan girl had spotted him…yet.

"That depends."

"I see." Artemis scanned ahead spotting a shop that fit the location Juliet had given to him. He paused at the doorway and looked over his shoulder at Butler who was looking at the windows with a peculiar expression. Following his gaze, Artemis's eyes landed on an uncomfortable sight. He felt his left eye twitch slightly and averted his sight to the sign. "Les Plus Belles. French for 'the most beautiful'. Not too surprising. Shall we enter, Domovoi?"

"It doesn't appear we have a choice," responded Butler, albeit reluctantly and steered Artemis into Les Plus Belles.

Racks of clothing were organized into several rows and all, to some extent, inappropriate in Artemis' opinion, but that wasn't what caught his attention. He picked up a piece of lingerie and showed it to Butler. "What contraption is _this_?" he asked, incredulously.

Butler jerked slightly. "Artemis, that's a women's underwear," he answered, uncomfortably, feeling horribly awkward.

" Butler, do you really expect me to believe that?" Artemis waved the insultingly skimpy piece of article of clothing, if it could be called that, for emphasis.

"It is an undergarment, Artemis."

"Are you _sure_ this is an underwear? It looks more like strings put together," Artemis protested. "Surely no one wear such a thing as that."

Butler didn't bother answering. He had caught sight of Juliet and Holly.

"Umm…Artemis…"

Artemis spun around quickly, dropping the offending strings. "Holly."

"I didn't know you were fascinated with that type of clothing," Holly snickered.

"It's not that," Artemis defended. "I merely found it difficult to believe that anyone is capable of wearing that."

"You wouldn't believe," remarked Holly, dryly. She turned and walked towards the siblings.

Artemis hurried to catch up. "Are you finished," he addressed Juliet.

Instead of an answer, he was hauled off by said person. "We need to fix that hair of yours and while you're getting it done, I'm getting your clothes. Come on, Holly. Your hair needs work, too. In fact, both of you are getting a major makeover."

"Wait," began Artemis. " Butler!"

"Hold on for a moment, Juliet."

" Butler, do you want a makeover, as well?"

"No—"

"Then come on, and don't forget to bring Holly."

Butler opened his mouth and then shut it. Instead he pulled Holly along with him.

Artemis looked back, helplessly. " _Butler__!"_

**

* * *

My thanks to all my reviewers and I'm so sorry for not updating for so long. I'd like to show my appreciation to all those who put me as one of their favorites. Please review; they make me happy. :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**To my reader, please forgive me on the slow update. I keep reading other people's fanfictions that I fail to update my own. Please review. I love you! Also I'd love it if you gave your ideas and suggestions for the school part, villain, parent meeting, etc. I need inspiration!**

One of the mall's fitting rooms, Ireland (2 hours, 45 minutes, 21 seconds and counting later)

"My work of art," declared Juliet, standing in front of a half open door.

Holly and Butler stared at her in nervous anticipation. Frankly, they really didn't know what to expect from Juliet. If Artemis was lucky, he'd retain some of his normal features. They hadn't heard anything from him for awhile and that in itself was unnerving.

"Ok!" Holly exclaimed, brightly. She pasted a cheerful smile on her lips. "Let's see it!"

Butler didn't bother speaking; instead, he settled on focusing his gaze on the fitting room Artemis occupied.

"Come on out, Artemis," sang Juliet, flinging open the door.

"Really, is it necessary to parade me around like a prize poodle," came Artemis's disgruntled voice.

"You look adorable," assured Juliet.

"You're even behaving as if I am a poodle. Therefore, I have reason to not commit myself to such humiliation."

"You might want to come out," called Holly. "The big man, here, seems pretty tense." She glanced at the bodyguard.

"This is utterly mortifying," Artemis grimaced. Taking a deep breath, he stepped out of the small enclosure.

Butler had taken on a look of relief when he saw Artemis, but on second look, his jaw dropped in an unseemly manner. Quickly, he shut it, yet continued to gape at his young charge. His hair had been spiked and tipped with red which hung over his face, giving a more menacing appearance. His clothes consisted of black apparel: ripped jeans, a shirt with the sleeves cut off, clunky boots, and a few chains adorning his slender physique. "Artemis…."

On the other hand, at the same time, Holly had dissolved into a fit of giggles. Artemis as a Goth, oh that was rich. It was too perfect. She tried to speak but failed for lack of breath.

Artemis scowled, looking at his two closest companions. Butler coughed lightly, coming out of his amazement. "Artemis, you look very convincing."

"Lovely," was the sarcastic response.

Juliet was indignant. "He looks great. He's a masterpiece."

"Right," Butler answered. "Holly seems to get a kick out of it."

The three turned to look at their last counterpart. Holly was doubled over in bouts of laughter, mumbling incoherently. "Vampire….evil….too perfect………..rich….positively brilliant…."

"Holly," said Juliet worriedly. "You all right there?"

Automatically, Holly stopped. "Perfectly fine." She turned to Artemis. "You fit the part," she informed him, seriously.

"Pray do tell what you found so amusing." Artemis towered over the elf's slight form.

A flash of mischief crossed Holly's face. "Nu-_thing_."

Artemis glared at her but instead said, "I believe it is high time we returned to the Manor. We'll have the clothes delivered there instead of carrying them."

* * *

Parking lot, Ireland

Butler had left Artemis and Holly in the protection of Juliet, going a little ahead to perform the customary search on the Bentley. Checking the underside of the car, he found nothing and moved on. His eyes caught sight of something out of place on one of the wheels of the car. Looking closer, his eyes widened. Instinctively, he turned and ran toward the three. Upon reaching them in a few steps, he unceremoniously flung them back, using his own weight and momentum to propel them. At the same moment, the Bentley exploded into a fiery cartwheel, the force further flinging them away.

For a good deal of time, none of them moved. In the distance they could hear the screaming and shouting of terrified civilians and the faint wail of sirens. Butler was the first to get up. "Report condition."

"I'm alright." Holly picked herself up gingerly. "What was that in Frond's name?"

"A bomb meant to kill us," Artemis stated, his voice muffled.

Juliet groaned as she stood up. She offered a hand to Artemis. Taking it, Artemis hauled himself upright. He dusted his clothes with little success. "Butler, I think we can safely assume everyone's condition is well thanks to you. However, we better leave before the authorities arrive."

"How are we supposed to do that?" Juliet wanted to know.

"Simple." Artemis removed a rectangular object from a pocket. Pressing something on it, a red light flashed once. He, then returned it to its rightful spot.

"Well," Holly said impatiently.

"Patience," he responded. As if on cue, a sleek black convertible skidded in front of them. "Get in."

Hurriedly, they climbed in; Artemis taking the driver's seat.

"Welcome, Master Artemis and his companions."

"D'Arvit," yelped Holly. "Who was that?"

"You may know me as the car, but you may call me Blaze."

"Artificial intelligence," Holly addressed Artemis. "When did you do this? And did you name it _Blaze?_

"No, it named itself. After all, it is capable of thinking although artificial. Now, I'd like to discuss the recent events. Undoubtedly, our new nemesis has contact with humans and is using it to his advantage. He means business clearly. I plan on calling one of our friend officers on salvaging remains of the Bentley and analyzing them for any trace of where the bomb is from or at least the components. Until then, we have to stay on guard. Butler, I'm afraid you'll have to pay a visit to one of our associates to upgrade the security on the Manor. Mother and Father will be returning with the twins soon as well. We cannot afford to raise any suspicion. Tomorrow will be a school day and I have decided that Holly and I will attend."

"This soon?" asked Holly.

"Discretion is essential at the current moment. We cannot afford to disclose our identity. I suggest you come up with an alias as I will proceed in the making of our credentials tonight. From now on, I wish you to address me as Zane Dwight. Holly?"

"Um… how about Maxine Wells?" Holly offered, "but my nickname can be Max."

"Very tomboyish, a fitting choice." Artemis presented her a half-smile.

She gave a small shrug. "A question. Do we have to act as if we don't know the material taught?"

"Just answer a few questions and if the teacher asks you one, go ahead." Butler twisted his body to look at Holly. "You don't happen to know human history, do you?"

"As a matter of fact, yes. We always had a fascination with Mud Men. Also something about knowing thy enemy."

"That's just weird," said Juliet as the vehicle turned into the driveway. "Hey Artemis, how are you going to explain Holly to your parents?"

"I haven't thought of that yet. As such, there might be a chance that we'll have to wing it."

"Since when did the great Artemis Fowl quit thinking and just winged it," butted in Holly.

"We are on a tight schedule. We'll squeeze in what the plan is and rehearsed it later. We're only bluffing our way through as a last resort. You might want to talk with Foaly and update each other. Try to persuade him to get involved."

Holly glowered at the back of Artemis's head. She should really quit taking orders from a teen Mud Boy.

"And by the way, I suggest you set your alarm for seven or so. School begins at 8:15. Don't be late."


	7. Author's Note

Hey its me again! i broke my laptop so i couldnt get on. I still need 2 save up 2 get a new desktop so...that'll b till I get back 2 skool TT OMG!! I also read the latest artemis fowl book!. the time paradox and it has some...ahem...interesting parts 3. anyway, this story is gonna have some revisions and also i'll try updating by the time i get back 2 skool. Anyways, this is just a heads up. Luv u all

Previous a/n underneath

I'm sooooooooooo sorry 4 not updating recently! :( Pls don't kill me.

i'v sriously become addicted to a game called Manga Fighter. Its really fun and i can't help but play...but, hey, if u wanna play me just go 2 -- www.mangafighter. Just download it and when u choose ur charac. and nickname, it asks u if there is any1 who recommended it 2 u, just put in my username-- Gleneva

Anyways, i haven't had much inspiration regarding this fanfic. I'd luv it if u all gave me some ideas and suggestions.

Again, im soooooo sorry 4 being so negligent.

books obsessed


End file.
